al-fatihah...in memories..

my day today began with a sad mode. as soon as i entered my office, i did sign in for ym. then, i saw my fren's status message- syaza. she wrote sumthing like "al-fatihah to nublan zaki norhadi". in my head, i think i know who is he but i just ignored as i never think that it wud be him. suddenly, few seconds later..blax buzzed me n straightly asked me whether have i heard bout the news? what news?? he did as well send a link tru ym n asked me to read bout it. i was totally shocked n speechless. deep inside me..i was praying that blax was talking about sumthing else that had totally no relation to what i read from syaza's status msg.

i tried to distract myself to check out new mails from official inbox. i had like 9 new mails n as i read the title of each msgs one by one...my eyes stopped at this particular msg. it was the latest mail that i've gotten sent by kak mila-my colleague.

it is about my ex-student-nublan zaki norhadi. i cudn't really recall at this moment whether had i thought him before but i am so 100% sure that he was deela's (my colleague@bestfren) student. the most significant event had happened back then between bulan (his nickname called by his frens) n deela was during last year's valentines day. the whole denver had done sumthing that made deel pissed off. bulan, the class rep at that time felt that it was his fault n responsibility of deel's anger. what he did was he bought a bouquet of flowers specially dedicated to deela to apologize for what had happened. it was valentines day and we were damn sure that the bouquet's price was damn expensive.

and today, i have found that he has passed away. innalillahirojiu'n.....COD: drowned at Abrams Falls, Great Smoky Mountains National Park in US. oh yeah...he was currently studying at Penn State Uni. August ni genap 2 thn diorg fly to US. I cried while reading the US n/paper 's online article. (i'll paste the link sumhow later). it was a tragic. he was not supposed to go there but aku percaya itulah ajal namanya. he drowned on Sunday evening but his body could only be founded the next 18 hours - more or less at 1.30pm monday. his body was found under 30 feet. walaupun berat nak terima tapi itu adalah sebuah hakikat. ada dua perkara yang sangat memedihkan. 1st- he is expectedly balik malaysia for summer this thursday. 2nd- in his FB, his current status is.. How I wish Malaysia is just near Penn State...

enuf said. nublan..allah lebih menyayangi kamu. semoga roh kamu dicucuri rahmat dan kamu ditempatkan di kalangan orang-orang yang beriman. al-fatihah...

http://www.wbir.com/news/local/story.aspx?storyid=88586&catid=2

documenting

nothing to write on.

but would like to document this moment.

wanna make it as something that could be remembered though in another 10 years.

is it a good news or bad news?

hhmm...

both i guess.

it makes me so far smile all the way to the evening

(though it's not yet in the evening but i know it will)

so mizleo, remember this moment kay!?

(",)

p/s: cik khom, bukan psl tuh okay..hehehe

diam

diam bukan bermakna lupa.

diam tak bererti benci.

diam tak bermaksud jemu.

diam penuh hikmah mengumpul ribuan semangat,

menjana aura,

menyubur rasa kasih, belas ihsan

dan

rindu dendam

pada si dia yang menanti di setiap kala.

dia

MMS 2009 - SHORT COURSE

keluarga besar MMS 2009

peace cut, vo-siem forza, wolverine, ceplos, elegance, synergy & bleach

AKSI-AKSI TIDAK FORMAL FACILITATORS *_*

~oh milo ice!~ *_*

saat ini..tiba2 aku teringat kat abg milo ice. tak tau nape. hehehee berdosa nya aku. tapi, tak tau nape aku dan dia dieratkan dgn milo ice. oh milo ice... *_*

agak bengang

aku mcm agak bengang ngan sorang minah nih. aku rasa dia saje jek nak poyos ngan public dpn aku. aku mcm tak paham ngan dia. apa masalah dia pun aku tak tau. utk pengetahuan minah a.k.a pompuan tuh, aku dilahirkan mesra alam. so, aku tak tau apa motif dia bila 'dia' yg dilahirkan tidak mesra alam cuba utk bermesra alam menggunakan aku. ko apahal??? kalo ko rase ko tak glamer..ko duduk diam2 kat belakang. tak yah nak buat lawak bodoh ko yg konon2 tak obvious tuh. aku takde hal buat masa nih...tp tolongla cari diri sendiri. n for ur info minah, itulah yg membezakan antara aku yang matang dgn ko yg masih bdk2 tuh. masakan ko sng bertukar!!?? lu pikir la sendiri!

aku takde hal. aku hidup dgn diri aku n aku happy. ko yg slalu bermasalah..n pastu poyo!

sekian.

hari yang agak memenatkan

bulan ni agak memenatkan. even though dah habis mengajar and students akan exam- it still doesn't indicate anything. malah keje semakin banyak and menimbun. in fact, even students dah abis exam, it's getting busier. i have to mark the papers...plus my colleague had just gave birth and i have to mark her students' paper as well since it's just both of us who are teaching the subject. it's fine but tiring. then, i am involved with the mms thingy. again, it's fun but tiring.

like yesterday, i've spent the morning with the new students esp the ones sponsored by JPA to the bank. of course naik bus uni la kan. then, noon tu lak, i've spent with the facis which are the current studs. and honestly, waktu ni lah waktu yg paling memenatkan sepjg 5 hari berkampung ngan diorg kat hostel. sebabnya, diorg have shared with us ( me n other frens) some of their teka-teki, games n tricks yang at one point relevant n real. but at another point..agak lawak bodoh la...but very interesting. yang cam tak caya nye, even my big boss for the event terkena gak ngan lawak2 bdk2 ni smua. and siyes...waktu ni we all were no more their lecturers coz we do kinda feel at some stupidity moment. hahahhaa...siyes... in fact, ada lagi trick diorg yg me n my frens tak leh figure it out yet.

it was so tiring till me n irda went back to the guest house n i did fell asleep till lewat petang. semuanya penangan kuteng n the gang...

:{

*******************************

aku penat.

aku restless.

*******************************

ikisipititnyi birihitskitlisikiringinitipiikipinihkiji

nikkitiikigitilikitiktihilihkidingkidingtihikitirisijigikpinit

tipiikitikkisihkiriniikisikibiitkijikijiini

idikihikitimikhilibikirini ikitirimisigiligilinyitipimistifthiwirksiri

nitiptimibitrithirmiibligitiin.....

aku penat n i am occupied till 20th may 09...huhuhhhuhuhu... :(

~bulan, indahnya malam ini~

today is the most peaceful day to me. started right from the morning till at this moment. i began my day with teaching all those needy students at their place. though there were flaws here n there...but i guess it's just fine. after all, nothing is perfect but i believe things could become perfect one day.

it is such a wonderful day today. nothing is much precious than your own family. i love my family soo much and only my family could give me a peaceful mind and soul. since i came back from the voluntary teaching activity, i spent my time at home till my sisters were coming along with my nephews and nieces. there are the one who actually make most of my days. their laughter, love, actions, behaviour, humour, happiness are all the reason that i think that not everyone would have the opportunity of having such sense of belonging.

we did have our own sweet time this afternoon. u dont have to really spend the time by doing something that u are actually not fond to. like just now, we were having fun doing manicure, then we have special session of putting inai on my sis n her daughter's hand and feet. after a while my nephews were helping along my sis in waxing her car. it's just a simple thing that is required. but the most important thing is the precious moment that u enjoyed together.

and my peaceful and wonderful day has actually ended just now whereby the whole family went out for dinner at the restaurant. enjoying the food while having fun talking and sharing stories- it's just so...peaceful. on the way home when we were nearly arrived, i saw a full moon. the feeling of looking at the moon is best described as the same feeling i had this whole one day with my family. i do believe with the phrase: "home sweet home".

i just feel that i do love my mom, my sisters, my nephews and nieces a looottt...!!! without them, i might not enjoying my life as it is now. and because of them as well, i have a wonderful life as they will support me no matter what. they are just one of a kind where you can't expect it from anybody else i.e., friends and strangers or even your loved ones.

kegembiraan ku tak terkata dan bila terpandangkan bulan malam ini, hati tiba-tiba jadi tenang dan aku amat senang menikmati bulan tanpa berfikir apa-apa. (",)

perception and perspective

On Sunday, khom and I have attended an event which was basically organized by my BIL and his team. Actually, I was being informed about this event on Saturday's noon which was quite last minute. They (the team) called me and offered me to do some voluntary work which is to educate anak-anak kampung for extra tuition. So in my mind, aku dah teringatkan cik khom coz both of us had already been done/used to voluntary works during university's life. Basically, we got no probs at all.

Maka, on the Sunday kitorang ke rumah di mana pelajar2 (anak2 kg) gathered. Agak ramailah - dalam 100 orang. Umur diorang dalam lingkungan darjah 1-6 and a few Form 1 students. Me and khom have decided to actually teach them english subject. We thought that we would be teaching them according to the same syllabus like the schools are doing. NO - we would not. We were being told that the students can't even read. And the most surprising fact is, even students of standard 6 could not read yet. So question: HOW ARE THEY GOING TO SIT FOR THEIR UPSR? At this point, we are not saying about reading english text specifically but rather reading in generally bigger scope.

Khom and I agak terkejut mendengar penyataan ini. Kami diberitahu yang pelajar-pelajar ni semua adalah majority anak-anak orang yang low-income. Their fathers work as fishermen, guards, etc. And for them to not having such exposure in studies is actually understood. So, our existence and appearance in the program/event is supposedly to bring them out of their 'kepompong'. It's quite a tough responsibility and challenging though! (",)

However, these are some of the experiences I had on that Sunday. It was actually the first time I met with the students and without preparation, I did some introductory session with them. The class was comprised of a mixture of feelings: kelakar, geram, kesian, gembira, menguji kesabaran etc. Therefore, let me shared with u guys some of the "touched" scenarios that had happened during the class session.

THE SCENARIO: I asked the students to give any vocabularies that they could find at school.



THE RESPONSE:



1) Schoolmate: I asked them the meaning of it in BM. They answered- kelas matematik.

2) Chalk: I asked one of them to spell it out. He spelled- C.H.O.P

3) Sheep: He wanted to say SHEEP but he said SHIT.

p/s: kat sekolah ada sheep ker? or even goat? hhmmm...(wondering...) *-*

EVALUATION: For the first time, it could be funny and cute. But the reality is, they really need help coz they are the future of our generation. It is sincerely hoped that there could be more non-profit activities as such to help in curbing the existing problems.

13th year

hari ini sebenarnya genap 13 tahun kakak aku yang ke-empat pulang ke rahmatullah. Semasa dia meninggal, aku masih di tingkatan dua dan aku berusia 14 tahun. Tak silap aku ketika tu, umur kakak aku baru berusia 24 tahun. Dia meninggal kerana paru-paru berair. Sahabat-sahabat terdekat aku tahu tentang chronology penyakitnya...

actually i was trying to find her photo but i couldn't. it was because my late sis didn't like her face n herself to be captured in the photo. so, ini jek gambar yang aku jumpa siang tadi. she's sitting second from the left.

frens, pls sedekah al fatihah to my late beloved sister as well as my late beloved dad. may their soul rest in peace. semoga roh mereka dicucuri rahmat. amin ya rabbil a'lamin...